Home Test Kitchen – Day 2
Recipe: The Humble Banana Muffin
Taste: Delicious and like a banana muffin with only a slight aftertaste (that no one in my family could detect but me)
Tears: Only tears of joy
Swearing: Not unless you count the Warrior’s Cry after battle
Texture: Like how a muffin should look…yummy, soft, and moist
Expense: criminal, but with a good-heart
Result: Ohhhhh Yeah (Kool-Aid Man Style)
Literary Inspiration: The Picture of Dorian Gray. These muffins could quite possibly sell their breakfast souls in order to retain their beauty and taste (and to become comfortably numb to the cost of flour).
Problem Solving: The major issue for me was the cost (I’m a schoolteacher for crying out loud). This flour costs more than an hour of minimum wage in the United States, therefore if you have food sensitivities you may want to take out a 2nd mortgage on your home (but then you good-food-people-of-alternative-cooking-land know this and I’m sure you’ve already mortgaged out a few times already). Also, I’m pretty sure it’s written in the pages of world history textbooks that long ago pepper sold for more than the price of gold and you know what they say about history repeating itself and all that nerdy awesome historian stuff.
Culprit: Wheat – because it is you I’m peacefully trying to replace. So yes, I’m pointing my finger at you wheat. Which finger? I will never tell.
Hunch: Too much wheat running wild on the streets. These gangs of wheat thugs are armed and dangerous!
Next Steps: Eat my banana muffins and make a French press while practicing my lousy French on my cats. Viva la muffin de banane!
Until Then: Think about reconfiguring the lyrics to, “Do You Know the Muffin Man?” into “Do You Know the Gluten-Free Muffin Man?” I have a feeling that muffin man has teeth made of gold and only operates in hundreds (I imagine him looking like the Monopoly Man but way more hipster!)
Happy Eating,
mlb@AWSB
P.S. I think I secretly have expensive taste and therefore I can justify this great recipe from the good people of Cup4Cup. Thank you for helping change the world.
Recipe Link: (http://www.cup4cup.com/recipes/banana-muffins/)
Filed under: alternative foods, baking, gluten free Tagged: alternative foods, baking, banana muffins, Celiac disease, Cup4Cup, diabetes, food humor, food industry, foodie, gluten free baking, gluten free flour, humor, literature, recipe, The Picture of Dorian Gray, type 1 diabetes
